How we gonna do this thing?
by green eyed typhoon
Summary: Rachel and Quinn are together in New York getting ready for college. Quinn's also nearing the end of her pregnancy and Rachel's feeling a little overwhelmed. She does what Rachel Berry does best when having trouble expressing herself, puts it into song. Amidst it all, Quinn reflects on the woman who'd changed her life. Idea inspired by the song Sh*t, Man! (acoustic) by Skylar Grey.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note:_ So if anyone notices the title of the story changed that's because I was contacted about how having a curse word in the title (the name of the song) is a bit of a no no... Awkward. Anyway I changed it and to anyone familiar with the song it's nothing drastic; I just used the first line in the main chorus of the song which luckily enough fits with the story anyways. Sorry about any confusion to previous readers, this is indeed the same story!

Edited 9/20/15

* * *

Quinn groaned when she realized she had forgotten her phone. She was not looking forward to taking her pregnant body back up the three flights of stairs to the apartment she shared with Rachel. It had taken a ridiculously long time to find a place that they could both agree on. Sometimes late at night when she was trying to sleep she imagined she could still hear an echo of Rachel's lectures on the necessities for the perfect living space in which they could live.

Even as she turned to slowly head back up the stairs cursing the broken elevator she couldn't help but feel the familiar flood of warmth rushing through her at the thought of sharing an apartment with Rachel. Their relationship was still new, and to many of their fellow glee clubbers made little sense but she cherished it and did her best to focus on how lucky she was to have been forgiven and accepted by the incredible girl who quickly became the most important person in her life.

Quinn had thought her life was over in summer after graduating high school when she learned of her pregnancy. Even almost 8 months later she still couldn't remember much of that night aside from wine coolers, awkward fumbling, a stinging pain, waking up next to Puck the morning after and regret.

A fucking lot of regret.

The stress of it all, her parents constant fighting and subsequent divorce, her loneliness, and the ache of knowing that she could never have the one person she longed for had been too much. It all culminated in finding herself doing her best to drink herself into oblivion and numb it all for one night at one of Puck's summer bashes. At the time she thought it had been the worst mistake of her life. She thought she was ruined, how was she supposed to go to college now? Not to mention the inevitable fallout once her parents found out.

But now, even with the fear and the stress; and the shame she had felt towards herself at the time for resorting to alcohol to cope. Which brought unpleasant similarities between her and her father to surface she didn't care to think about, she still wouldn't change a thing.

How could she ever change anything when it had eventually lead to her getting together with Rachel? The woman she desired but feared she could never have, that she didn't deserve. Even now she marveled at how lucky she was. Lucky both that Rachel had reciprocated her feelings and that the beautiful diva had made the effort to understand her. Understand and forgive Quinn for all of the terrible things done during high school. Something Quinn still hadn't quite managed to forgive herself for no matter Rachel's understanding smile and the way she waved the whole thing away as if it were a non-issue as opposed to a systematic and cruel bullying campaign.

Absently rubbing her stomach as she reached the second floor she stopped to catch her breath. Being pregnant and living on the third floor did not mesh well together she thought ruefully.

She still remembered the conversation that changed her life forever, even if she hadn't realized it at the time. She doubted she'd ever forget it.

* * *

She had been crying in the bathroom of the mall. It had all hit her at once, the enormity of change her life would go through. The difficulties she would face as a consequence of one nights drunken unfulfilling stupidity. The worst part was that it didn't even help anything. She was still just as stressed from dealing with her parents and just as lonely as she was before and now she had Puck in her life trying to make some fucked up family with her. As though the fact she had been stupid enough to drink and he had been dumb enough to not wear a condom meant they should be together. The thought made her want to wretch. As she sat there on the floor hands clenched into fists on her head crying furiously and unable to stop she heard the sound of the door opening. Desperately trying to stop her tears before being seen she wasn't able to and only succeeded in making choking hiccuping noises.

"Quinn?"

Quinn froze. There was no way her life sucked this much. She clenched her eyes shut and prayed it was anyone else in the world who had walked in on her like this.

"Quinn…. are you alright?"

Fuck. Of course she wasn't that lucky. Slowly she opened her red rimmed eyes in an effort to delay the inevitable. It took her a few seconds for her eyes to focus past the tears and clearly see the worried brown eyes looking down on her. Of course it was Rachel. She stood in front of Quinn in a simple pair of jeans and a green coat. Her compassionate eyes looking down on her with worry lightly biting her lower lip. Quinn just stared unwilling to break the silence; half mortified to be caught like this by the person she cared so deeply for and half distracted as she often was when confronted by Rachel.

"Quinn are you okay?" Rachel asked gazing worriedly down to Quinn, wringing her hands nervously as she were physically holding herself back from hugging her and asking what was wrong.

Quin jolted and realized she had been staring at Rachel for close to a minute not saying anything. She opened her mouth to reply ...

* * *

_Author Notes – _The song used in this fic is "Shit, Man!" by Skylar Grey and as such does not belong to me. The acoustic version (not the one with Angel Haze) is the one I had in mind while writing this fic and really I am just sorta of writing this out because it's an idea that I've had kicking around for a while now and thought I'd try to get it in print. It will probably be a short story something like 2-4 chapters but I might eventually add more depending on response and if I feel I can add something meaningful to the story. This is really just an exercise to sort of get my feet wet as it were as I've just started posting stories recently.


	2. Chapter 2

Edited 9/20/15 Mostly added quite a bit to Rachel's pov. Hopefully it gave more depth to how Rachel was reacting and what she was feeling while Quinn had her breakdown. Let me know what you guys think and if there's anything you think could use some improvement.

* * *

...

Nothing came out. What could she say to explain this? Quinn was thinking desperately trying to come up with some sort of explanation that would dissuade Rachel from asking any other questions of her because lately Quinn found it very hard to lie to Rachel. It was fast becoming more of a problem as her feelings for the little diva grew.

Just six months ago back before her parents started fighting constantly she wouldn't have had to think twice on how to respond to this sort of situation. She would have responded with venom an artfully designed barb to pierce the other girls defenses to cause maximum damage. She felt sick just at the thought now.

Six months ago she thought she knew what she had to do. Six months ago she was in the picture perfect family and was expected to maintain that image. Six months ago she was Quinn Fabray daughter of Russel and Judy Fabray and the HBIC at Mckinley High. Six months ago she learned how little that actually meant.

Her mother apparently had some crisis of conscious and was able to crawl out of her bottle of wine long enough to notice her husband's alcoholic and cheating tendencies as well as the amount of pressure he was placing on their daughter. She saw how unhappy her daughter was and decided enough was enough.

Quinn still wasn't sure what the catalyst for that change was.

That's when the fighting started. Quinn remembered hiding in her room clutching her old stuffed lamb and feeling younger than she had in a long time as the yells from downstairs echoed upward.

After the divorce Quinn realized that her perfect family was anything but. She felt stupid in retrospect that it had taken something so drastic to see something so obvious. Really though she hadn't wanted to see it. Why would she? Ignorance is bliss as they say.

Ruefully Quinn with that realization came a deeper understanding of her mother than she'd had in a long time.

Six months ago Quinn was confronted with the hypocrisy of the image her father demanded she maintain.

Six months ago Quinn was a different person from the Quinn Fabray currently sitting on the floor of a mall public bathroom desperately trying to come up with a way to answer Rachel. No, her defensive go to response of hurtful words would not work here, not with Rachel, not again.

She refused.

"Quinn? Please, answer me. I'm getting worried and I really want to hug you and ask you what's wrong but I know you would hate it if I did that but I don't know how long I can contain myself so if you could please answer me to distract me that would be wonderful" Rachel's eyes were pleading as she fidgeted and bit her trembling lip in an effort to contain the words that desperately tried to spill forth from the increasingly nervous diva.

Quinn stared at her eyes wide. That was a lot of words in one breath but; well, that was Rachel she supposed. It used to irritate her beyond all reason, or at least she convinced herself it did. Now though, had there ever been anyone more adorable? It was a little unfair for someone as talented as Rachel, and she was talented no matter what her fellow glee clubber said, to be that ridiculously adorable as well.

Not the time for those kind of thoughts. She still didn't know what to tell her though and she scrambled desperately for something to say. The truth was not an option….

Was it?

...

Six months ago, Quinn was barely living. Letting her father's desires rule her even as it crushed any semblance of self she had and hurt the ones around her. Six months ago Quinn was too afraid to go against his wishes even as she hurt her friends with her distant attitude and cold words. Six months ago Quinn was afraid and miserable.

Six months ago Quinn was a different person.

Maybe the truth would be an option. Maybe at least then someone would understand and even if it didn't go well, someone would know that she felt, really felt! And privately Quinn hoped this act of opening up, something entirely uncharacteristic of her and against everything her father had ever taught her would be a small victory for her. It would signify that she could change even if only a little.

That maybe there was a light for her at the end of the tunnel.

She felt something in herself with the though. Something... not certain, but resolute.

Today Quinn wouldn't allow herself to be that person. Even if she was confessing to a person who she tortured, who by all rights should hate her for what she did, who she loved more than anything. She loved the way she smiled, the way she sang, her cute dimples and wide smile and slightly crooked nose. God she was fucked up.

She may be fucked up, and miserable and she may have just screwed up her entire future from a single night of sheer idiocy. She may be all those things, but as she looked into those warm beautiful eyes of a girl with the most un-man like hands she'd ever met Quinn made a decision.

Today she would be brave.

She looked up at Rachel, opened her mouth, and told her.

Everything.

She told her about her father and his drinking. How he would yell at the slightest imperfection. How she always felt as though in his eyes she wasn't enough, a disappointment. That she suspected he'd always wanted a son and never got over the fact he'd had a daughter instead.

She told her of how her mother was distant and could usually be found in her own world half way down a bottle of wine. Distant and lost and in no position to help her daughter. How she wished so badly that she could turn to her for comfort and strength and never felt able too.

Quinn told Rachel how betrayed she felt that the person she was supposed to be able to turn to for anything wasn't there for her.

She told Rachel of how her mother had seemingly changed over night. Giving up the wine and divorcing her father. Standing up for her daughter, doing her best to support and protect her.

That she desperately wanted to believe in this new change her mother had gone through but that she was afraid it was only temporary; she told Rachel this and that she was ashamed of being unable to trust her mother when she so dearly wanted to.

Quinn told Rachel how empty she felt going through the motions day to day at school maintaining her place at the top of the social ladder, doing nothing but making others feel lesser.

She explained how it ached to act so similar to a man like her father but that she didn't know how to not be that way.

She told Rachel how desperate she was for his approval, how much she yearned to hear the words I'm proud of you fall from his lips. How confused she was as their carefully constructed Stepford family imploded. That if her father was so wrong, was such a hypocritical and flawed person, what did that make her? Quinn spoke to Rachel about how her mom was for the first time in recent memory was making an effort to be interested in her life.

Quinn looked at Rachel with tears in her eyes and apologized. She told her how sad it made her when she was mean to her. How much it hurt to see her fighting tears and covered in slushy and that she didn't deserve anything form her but she was so fucking sorry.

The bathroom was silent. The only sounds was Quinn's shuddering breaths as she strove for some semblance of control.

With a deep fortifying breath and closed eyes Quinn told her how in her confusion and pain she sought a way to dull this whirling mass of turmoil and feelings she couldn't deal with at Puck's party. Lost in the chaos of her emotions and the intense relief at finally saying all of this to someone Quinn was oblivious to the brunettes reaction.

* * *

Rachel stared at this blonde stranger sitting on the floor tear tracks streaked down her face and dull eyes. She looked beautiful in a very tragic sort of way. Not that this really surprised Rachel all that much, Quinn always looked beautiful and it was only fitting that she'd be beautiful even in tears.

She didn't know how to process this. It was so much information all at once. Surely there was no way this was the cool and confident Quinn Fabray that could freeze the entire hockey team with nothing more than an arched brow. The girl who until a few months ago had been her main tormentor. The beautiful and cold girl she had admired from afar. It was difficult for Rachel to reconcile the two totally different people she was seeing. The often cruel incredibly distant and cold HBIC juxtaposed against the fragile beautiful girl baring her soul.

But, well, the background information revealed certainly added a new perspective on how and why Quinn acted like... well, Quinn.

Not that that made it okay! It didn't. Nevertheless Rachel couldn't stop the surge of sadness she felt at the terrible stress Quinn seemed to have been under.

She looked... ironically the most apt comparison Rachel could think of was how she herself sometimes looked in the mirror after a particularly awful day at school.

It wasn't as satisfying as the darker parts of Rachel had imagined it to be when she'd been hurt and confused as to what was wrong with her. Why she was the person that the whole school had seemed to pick to express their anger and frustrations toward.

No, it didn't make her feel vindicated or satisfied. It just made her feel sad. She knew how it was to be reduced to such a state and wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Not even Quinn...

Especially not Quinn.

She couldn't help but felt touched when Quinn talked about how terrible she felt whenever she saw Rachel bullied. Actually, it was more than that. Warmth spread through her body from her heart to her toes at the earnest honesty she saw in Quinn. She'd admired Quinn for a reason after all. She was exceedingly intelligent and incredibly beautiful. There was a lot to like about her had she not been so cruel, and Rachel had privately mourned the lost potential of a friendship between the two of them.

The diva had known that HBIC attitude of hers wasn't all there was to Quinn. Not even close. She'd seen evidence enough of that through glee club. But every time it seemed as though they might be getting somewhere towards a reconciliation of some kind something seemed to happen to upset the fragile peace between the two of them.

Still, she never in a million years would have imagined that Quinn had hidden all of this pain and regret from everyone. She scoured her mind searching for something to help, to make Quinn feel more at ease but all she came up with was an unhelpful and entirely inappropriate thought that if she could hide this she'd probably make an excellent poker player.

As Rachel listened to Quinn bare her soul she found herself filled with a rush of righteous indignation at whatever Puck did at the party that caused Quinn to hesitate after all she had just shared. What more could there be? The strength of these emotions surprised herself but before she could think too much on that or indeed anything else Quinn had spoken of Rachel's thoughts were interrupted by the cheerleader who looked ready to speak again.

* * *

Quinn hesitated at this part. She looked at Rachel who had a strange expression on her face. She couldn't interpret it, but she didn't seem angry or scornful nor had she left yet which she knew was more than she could have hoped for.

Probably more than she deserved. Who was she kidding? If the universe was a fair and just place she'd be dripping in slushie midway through her breakdown. And that's what this was wasn't it? And despite the relief the felt at getting this off her chest she couldn't help the embarrassment and shame. Not all of her HBIC act was false after all. She loathed the thought of being seen as weak and losing control. Still the way she'd been had clearly done her no favors and she'd went this far already.

There was no going back. The realization was both terrifying and freeing.

She would just have to trust that Rachel was as good a person as she knew her to be. She would have to trust in her. Something she didn't do easily or ever really until now. But today was a day to be brave.

She took a deep breath and spoke.

She told Rachel about the party. How she wasn't originally going to go but her father had visited to pick up the last of his stuff and she wanted to be anywhere but there. She told her about drinking the wine coolers and how fuzzy the night became after that.

She dropped her eyes and stared at her shoe laces as she told Rachel of how she ended up in Puck's room. She told her of the awkward and uncomfortable sex she'd had with him, how she barely remembered any of it aside from the pain of him entering her and his slurred words of encouragement. She couldn't look up to meet Rachel's gaze as she told her of the disgust she felt toward herself that she would give up her first time to someone she didn't love and didn't want to be with. Of how dirty she felt the next day in his bed. How worthless she felt at Puck's casual greeting the morning after. Of how she'd fled his house, only allowing herself to cry once she'd reached the safety of her room.

Her eyes gazed downward dully, unseeing, as she told Rachel of the panic she felt at missing her period. Of how she was so shamed and afraid that she took a bus to a convenience store the next town over to buy a pregnancy test. How she'd gone in there feeling apprehensive and ridiculous in her oversized hoodie to shield her identity. Her simultaneous anger and shame from the judgmental gaze of the checkout lady.

She told Rachel of how her world stopped when she saw that the test came out positive. She told of how she panicked and so far hadn't told anyone other than Puck and as she mentioned that to Rachel she found herself telling her about her frustration and anger at Puck's determination to use their one night of stupidity to try and be together. Some doomed attempt at creating a happy little family.

She told Rachel of how the thought of being with Puck in that way made her sick to her stomach, especially after the party. She also told Rachel how that made her feel a little guilty as well. Because it wasn't as if Puck forced her and this...

Quin choked unable to say the word but it was half his too. But she didn't want him, to be with him, or really anything to do with him right now.

She felt a stinging as more tears threatened to fall and she told Rachel of overwhelmed she is. How her life is ruined and how her fragile relationship with her newly attentive mother will be destroyed. How her dreams of leaving this hellhole for university to go on to bigger and better things seems destroyed. How she's terrified she'll just end being another Lima loser.

Quinn paused to catch the breath she hadn't realized sh'ed been holding and prepared to tell Rachel her last secret. She was to afraid to look up and see Rachel's reaction to all that she'd told. Was it disgust? For giving herself away like that so easily. Pity? She didn't want to know.

Quinn opened her mouth to tell Rachel finally how she felt about her. Her heart was pounding and her mouth was dry. Of everything she had just said this was probably the most terrifying. She licked her lips and was started to tell Rachel her final secret when she was interrupted by arms around her neck and a warm body drawing flush against hers.

Her eyes flew open wide with shock and the only thing that penetrated the haze of her confusion was the scent of cinnamon, the herbal tea the diva drinks so frequently to help care for her voice and something that was uniquely Rachel.

Rachel was hugging her.

Rachel. Was. Hugging. Her!

It didn't compute. This didn't feel real. That after all of what she said. The unrelenting wave of fears, self-loathing, and sadness she just threw at the little singer. It didn't seem possible that she would hug her when she should be running in the opposite direction to get away from the basket case. She didn't realize she'd been holding her breath until she started to feel dizzy.

With a slow whoosh she let it out slowly and relaxed cautiously into the hold of the smaller girl. Surprisingly strong for such a petite thing. It must be all the dance lessons Quinn mused distractedly.

She opened her mouth to give her final confession. That she, Quinn Fabray was in fact in love with Rachel Barbra Berry, the loudest and most talented member of New Directions. But she couldn't do it. Not now because what if she told her and Rachel left her? She couldn't handle that, not now when she was so vulnerable. So she eased into Rachel's hold and allowed herself to be comforted.

Today Quinn was brave, but she was also a little bit selfish. She would enjoy this while it lasted.

She could live with being a little selfish.

* * *

_Author's Note – _wow okay so this story is becoming a bit longer than I'd thought. I originally was just going to do a quick 1 chapter song fic mostly centered around Rachel. But so far its 2 chapters in and we haven't even gotten to that part yet and thus far Quinn has dominated the story. But yea I guess I didn't realize how much it would take to get to that point. But we'll make it there in time. I would greatly appreciate any reviews from people. If something I've written interested you, confused you, you approved or though I could improve in some way, if something here resonated with you guys in any way I'd dearly love to hear about it. Even a simple good chapter or some other small encouraging review would be great as I am really new to writing; especially posting what I've written for others to see, and I am always looking to improve and would be grateful for what you guys (and girls) have to offer.

_Author's Note 2- _I found in my eagerness to post that I really didn't do much reviewing of any of my stories. Oops. So I looked through this and made some changes to the dialogue and corrected some grammar etc... It doesn't change the story drastically but I think that it certainly reads better and It's good to catch all of this before getting to deep into the story. Hope you all enjoy!


	3. Chapter 3

Edited - 9/20/15 Hopefully conversation now flows better and emotions are expressed better. Lemme know what y'all think.

* * *

Rachel wasn't sure how long she sat like this. Arms around Quinn doing her best to comfort her and trying her best to think of someway to help her.

It was a lot to take in though.

A lot.

Quinn was clearly going through a bunch of different things and there was no way she could reasonably hope to address it all in a single conversation.

Rachel was also extremely conscious of the fact that this was the first time she'd ever held Quinn before which to put it lightly was causing her to freak the fuck out. It was a testament to how big a deal this was to her that she swore even if it was only in her head, she was of the firm opinion that curse words were a sign of laziness. English was a vast language and there were far more interesting ways to express oneself.

That being said…

Holy shit! Quinn smells so good and she's so warm and her body fits so perfectly against hers even in this awkward position hunched over her seated form…

Rachel did her best to shake off those thoughts and focus. Quinn needed her. Someone needed her, someone whom she cared greatly about despite all common sense and she wouldn't fail her.

Doing her best to ignore the warm breath heating her neck and sending shivers down her spine Rachel tried to think of what to do.

There wasn't any point in addressing any of what Quinn said, at least not right now. There was a lot said and Rachel herself needed to process it all before even considering commenting on any of it.

So…

First step.

Make Quinn feel better.

Nodding to herself with determination Rachel lifted herself creating a little distance between the two of them causing Quinn to look up to her.

She always did better when she had a list.

Carefully using her thumbs Rachel gently cleared Quinn's face of tear tracks and cleared her throat lightly.

"What do you want to do?"

It was a fairly open-ended question but they couldn't stay here. Frankly, it was a miracle someone hadn't come in already and the last thing Rachel wanted was for someone to see Quinn in this state. So maybe Rachel couldn't wave a wand and fix everything for Quinn but she could give her this. Whatever Quinn asked for, right now, Rachel would make it happen. That's all there was to it.

When Rachel decided she wanted something she went for it full force. And right now, Rachel was nothing if not determined.

* * *

Quinn started at the question and wondered if she'd heard right.

What did she want?

She couldn't quite keep the bitter thoughts from emerging, 'since when did that matter?'

Thankfully she managed to keep that thought too herself. Rachel didn't deserve that. Not when she was here after everything. Not when she stayed and held her and fit so perfectly with her. Not when she looked at her with those warm eyes that said Quinn mattered. That how Quinn felt mattered to her.

Warmth suffused through her at the thought of Rachel caring for her and she couldn't help but let her mind wander on possibilities before her stomach clenched as she remembered her situation and how there was no way it could ever happen. She fought back a fresh wave of tears and tried to come up with an answer for Rachel who was still looking at her warmly and slowly rubbing her back trailing heat wherever her hand went.

What did she want?

Quinn looked around as though seeing for the first time where she was. The mall bathroom was not exactly the best of locations and as she took it all in she started to feel suffocated. If Rachel weren't here with her she might have run to get out.

What did she want?

Quinn looked over to Rachel.

"I want to be anywhere but here." She did her best not to wince at how small her voice was.

Rachel blinked at her and smiling in response and standing up. As if she expected no other answer. That what Quinn said made perfect sense, which was strange because Quinn had no clue about anything right now.

Reaching down she waited for Quinn to take her hand and she easily pulled the taller girl up displaying that dancer's strength. Lightly patting down Quinn in an effort to clean her from sitting on the floor of a public restroom she gave Quinn a wink.

"What a coincidence. That's exactly where I was going"

Quinn couldn't stop a small quirk of her lips at Rachel's ridiculousness and allowed herself to be led out through the mall and towards the parking lot.

Her small smile grew a little when Rachel opened the door of her powder blue Prius with an exaggerated bow in an display of extreme comedic chivalry.

Rachel smiled brightly in response to Quinn's smile as though she'd won a prize and hurried over to the driver side door and moved to leave the mall.

* * *

Rachel looked over to Quinn who'd been staring out the window. She had yet to speak a word since they left the mall. It wasn't an awkward silence though. More reflective than anything.

Rachel couldn't deny that she was a bit nervous about where they were going. It didn't take her long to think of the perfect place to got but she hadn't shared her spot with anyone before. However, at the same time this wasn't anyone. This was Quinn.

So even if she was nervous about sharing this part of her, she would do it anyway.

Besides Rachel thought chastising herself for her doubts, how could she hold back on this after all that Quinn had just shared with her?

She did her best to ignore the voice in her head that sounded suspiciously like Finn telling her that what she was doing was stupid. That no matter what had happened at the mall this was still Quinn Fabray. The HBIC who'd had more than a hand in sending her home from school in tears on multiple occasions.

She had to remind herself that the Quinn from school and the Quinn she'd found on the floor in tears were different people entirely. She forcefully ignored the voice in her head snidely asking if her judgment wasn't being clouded by her desires.

Because, as noted before Quinn was extremely beautiful. Easily the most beautiful girl Rachel had ever seen. But that's not what this was about.

So Rachel may have had a small…. ok huge crush on Quinn. But this wasn't about Rachel. This was about Quinn, and Quinn hardly needed her advances after all that she was dealing with.

Still she couldn't quite fight the urge to reach over and grab Quinn's hand in her own, eyes determinedly fixed on the road a light red dusting over her tanned face. She didn't see Quinn stare wide-eyed at their joined hands nor the blush that stained the paler girl's cheeks.

* * *

Quinn stared at their joined hands and wondered absently how anyone could think that Rachel's hands were in any way shape or form manly. They were small and cute just like the rest of the diva. She gave a tentative squeeze and smiled lightly when she felt Rachel returning the pressure.

Quinn jolted slightly when she felt the car come to a stop, distracted as she was by the pleasant warmth of their joined hands. She looked around their destination in curiosity.

"Anywhere" turned out to be the edge of a park. It was an older park with a dilapidated jungle gym made of wood that was completely deserted which was a little odd considering it was the summer.

Quinn looked at Rachel arched an eyebrow questioningly.

Rachel blushed lightly and hurried to explain.

"This is my spot"

Quinn looked askance at Rachel at the rather simple explanation.

"Your spot?"

Rachel simply nodded in response and started walking to the playground, Quinn trailing behind bemusedly.

"When I was a kid, this was my kingdom" Rachel explained awkwardly with a blush. "I used to explore a lot as a kid. I was alone a lot because parents weren't usually fond of the idea of their kids playing with me so I'd explore around the neighborhood and pretend I was having amazing adventures searching for lost lands and treasures." Rachel said all this with a wistful smile as she took in the worn and torn play area with fondness.

Quinn took in the area with new eyes, this place that was clearly important to Rachel. There was a wooden bridge connecting a tall castle like fort area attached to an old plastic slide with graffiti on it and monkey bars on the other end as well as an old rusted out swing set. Only one of the seats had both chains holding it up with the other two hanging uselessly on one chain.

What drew her eyes and a laugh from the blonde cheerleader was the small plastic flag emblazoned with a gold star sitting proudly on top of the castle like structure declaring to the world that this was Castle Berry.

Rachel saw where her eyes were drawn and blushed furiously in embarrassment but giggled along with Quinn.

Quinn changed her mind; this might be the best park she'd ever been too. Still, one part of what the brunette told her stuck out.

"Why didn't parents want you around their children?" Quinn asked drawing her gaze from the castle to look intently at the other girl, distracted from her own problems at yet another hardship forced on a girl who deserved none of it.

Rachel fought not to fidget under the laser focus of Quinn's intense hazel eyes. She hadn't meant to say that, or at least she hadn't meant for Quinn to make anything of it. She debated trying to skirt around the question but a look at Quinn's face quickly disabused that notion.

Quinn watched Rachel bite her lip indecisively as she thought about how to answer before looking at Quinn carefully and seemingly coming to a decision.

Quinn followed her as she walked across the bridge and up to her tower and Quinn found herself distracted by the childish pictures that wall papered the walls. She was distracted from a closer inspection when Rachel began to talk.

"It's no secret that my parents are in a homosexual relationship. And as you know it is also not a secret that Lima isn't exactly a paragon of acceptance. "

Quinn frowned at the bitterness in Rachel's voice. Rachel was always so strong and put together. Rarely did it seem the constant bullying at school had any effect on her impenetrable shell. It was sometimes easy to forget that for all her spirit she wasn't invincible. Quinn held back the grimace at the realization she wasn't the only one with a mask at school. She'd known this of course, though she doubted she'd have come to find out without glee club. Still it wasn't something she liked to think about. It made her a sick mix of angry and guilty.

"You know what it's like for me at school" Rachel continued unknowingly echoing her thoughts and Quinn couldn't help the wince or the shame that suffused through her at that statement despite the lack of accusation in Rachel's voice.

A weary sigh came from the brunette.

"It's not like this sort of treatment started in high school Quinn. People can be cruel and awful. Its not just children or people our age either, adults can be too. They didn't want their children associating with the 'fag spawn'" Rachel spat.

Quinn shivered a little not used to hearing such vitriol from the little singer.

More than that though Quinn felt anger. Familiar and hot threading through her very being at the way Rachel had said those disgusting words. As though she were quoting something that had been aimed at her previously.

The thought alone sent a sharp anger pounding through her and she wasn't sure what she'd do if confronted with one of those people right now. Rachel's voice distracted her from her anger, she sounded exhausted as she continued speaking.

"People aren't nice" she repeated resignedly, "and it doesn't matter if it's parents, children, or other high school students. That's just the way it is, and so I was alone a lot" she concluded plainly.

Quinn ached at the way Rachel spoke. As though she were exhausted, defeated, and worst of all to Quinn, accepting of the situation as simply the status quo.

Gone was the confident diva that never stopped smiling her huge smile and dreaming her big dreams. In its place was a lonely girl who'd lost faith in others due to consistent neglect and exclusion.

Quinn ached. She ached for this girl who was so much more than she'd thought; who hurt like she hurt. She ached for the girl that she cared for so much, but most of all she was angry.

Quinn found herself full of futile rage at the injustices of the world that someone as amazing and kind and undeserving of this awfulness as Rachel had to deal with such discrimination.

There was no outlet for her anger though. No convenient target to destroy utterly for making her Rachel sound so world weary. Her Rachel who was destined for so much greater than the small people from small Lima.

Bereft of a target for her rage and left with a small girl who seemed even smaller when sad, hugging herself and lost in her thoughts. Quinn reached over to the other girl grabbing her and pulling her tightly against her in a strong hug.

Quinn found herself marveling at the ridiculousness of this day. That she would meet Rachel and be comforted and accepted by her only to end up doing the same for her only a few hours later. So much had happened and it left her feeling drained.

* * *

Distantly Rachel realized she was being held by Quinn. Internally though she was… surprised wasn't the word to use but the normally verbose girl couldn't muster the energy to think of something more appropriate.

Rachel thought she had long sense dealt with and overcame the pettiness of people and the isolation of her childhood and later high school. It was the main reason she held so fiercely onto Glee Club she knew.

The singing was nice of course, and Rachel Berry would never be one to miss a chance to perform but the real reason she was so passionate about Glee Club was because it represented the first time in her life where she had a way to interact with her peers who might hopefully one day even become friends. Rachel had later found herself sadly disappointed for the most part at how it seemed for the most part the her fellow glee clubbers didn't really seem to like her all that much and that not much overall had changed. Regardless of that though Glee Club represented a chance for something more than the isolated explorations of her childhood.

Rachel hadn't realized how heavy it all still weighed on her until she spoke of it out loud to Quinn. Rachel was interrupted from her tumultuous thoughts by Quinn's voice.

"I don't like it when you cry"

Her voice was soft, clear and soothing like a balm to her emotions and Rachel felt herself relax into the fit cheerleader at the sound of it.

Crying?

Rachel was started to find that she did indeed have tears trailing down her cheeks.

The blonds smiled softly at the confused brunette and used her thumbs to dash the tears from her cheeks mirroring the brunette's actions from earlier.

"I don't like crying either" the brunette admitted with a small smile for the blonde.

The two girls found themselves lost in each other's gaze for a beat before Rachel broke out into a watery chuckle confusing the blonde.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I was supposed to make you feel better. I brought you here to share part of myself the way that you did with me earlier. I wanted this to be happy and now here you are comforting me. I'm sorry, I guess I'm just not good at helping others" Rachel confessed.

Quinn looked at the brunette with a little surprise. Truthfully, she really was feeling much better than earlier. Aside from the sadness at knowing with a little more clarity how much Rachel had deal with and how unfairly she was treated due to who her parents chose to love Quinn found herself feeling better just by being around the singer.

She breathed life into her and Quinn found herself for the first time feeling at some sort of equilibrium within herself. No longer drowning amongst her fears and worries with all that is going on in her life she was able to just focus on how amazing it was to be alone with Rachel.

"I haven't been this happy in a long time" Quinn said deciding to enlighten the smaller girl in her arms.

And it was true. How could she feel anything less than amazing when she had Rachel in her arms?

Rachel's eyes widened at that in surprise. Blinking, she let herself relax into the blonde's hold and burrowed into her neck inhaling the scent that was uniquely Quinn.

"That's good" she murmured.

Neither girl knew how long they spent in each other's arms on Castle Berry but it had long since turned to evening before they gathered themselves and left for their respective homes with promises to meet together soon.

Unknowingly both girls shared the same thought as they drifted off to sleep.

What a crazy day.

* * *

_Author's Note_: So here is another chapter. Its official, this story is definitely going to be longer than planned. But that's okay, I'm having a lot of fun writing it and hopefully some of you lads and lasses are having fun reading it. Speaking of you lovely readers I want to give a special thanks and acknowledgement to those of you who took the time to review, follow, and or favorite this story. There has been something north of 250 views on this story and comparatively few reviews so I'd like to thank from the bottom of my heart those that took the time to leave me their thoughts and comments. I'd also like to encourage others to do the same. I really would like to know how my work so far is being received so I would be grateful for anyone that deigns to leave a review. Regardless though, I really hope you guys enjoyed this new chapter : )!

Also with regards to Quinn, I hope you guys like how I've decided to portray her. This is a Quinn whose in the middle of change and personal growth and whose already acknowledged her feelings for Rachel and all that comes with it. Right now she's facing a lot and so maybe isn't as take charge or for lack of a better word bitchy as one might expect. Not to say that she's gone soft, she's still got that fire I promise, otherwise she wouldn't be Quinn right? I hope you like her so far though!


	4. Chapter 4

It took about a half an hour of lying in bed the next day before Quinn was fully convinced that yesterday had in fact happened. The way she'd acted was completely out of character for her but she couldn't bring herself to regret it. As hard and strange as it was all that she could really do about the events of yesterday was accept it and move on.

Right now she only had two things on her agenda. Figure out what to do about the… it. She still couldn't quite bring herself to fully acknowledge what was growing inside of her.

And second, don't fuck up with Rachel.

Against all odds this, disaster gave her one last chance to connect with the diva and have her a part of her life. Maybe not in the way she'd prefer, especially not whilst carrying Puck's spawn inside her.

Quinn paused to gag at that thought and was about to resume her silent declaration to be a friend to Rachel when she was interrupted by her cellphones ringtone.

The grimace from hearing the voice of Sue Sylvester barking encouragements and/or threats depending on how you squinted was not a pleasant first thing in the morning… or ever. She really should change that now that she'd graduated and was no longer a Cheerio, and thus no longer legally obligated to have that as her ringtone. With an irritated sigh, she snagged her phone to see who was calling her at 8:30 in the morning.

The grimace disappeared on seeing the girl that was taking up her thoughts on the caller ID. She hesitated before answering, feeling the unfamiliar butterflies flutter in her stomach.

She was nervous. She didn't get nervous!

Quinn deflated before she could get too bothered by it. What was the point after all? If yesterday wasn't a clear indication that Rachel effortlessly broke all the rules of Quinn Fabray she didn't know what was.

With a sheepish shake of her head, she went to answer the phone before it hit her voicemail, feeling that nervous warmth whenever Rachel came up.

The nervous, tingly giddiness she'd come to associate with Rachel vanished instantly upon hearing the voice on the other end of the phone.

"Hey Quinn, uhh, how's it going?"

Any happiness she had been experiencing vanished at the sound of that voice.

"Puck," she growled, "why the fuck do you have Rachel's phone!"

Her voice was ice cold, reminiscent of when she'd ruled McKinley with an iron fist.

None of the disgust or shame made its way through her voice when confronted with the person whom she'd had a drunken mistake with. All she could focus on was the immediate and visceral anger at Puck having Rachel's phone, and what could have happened to her for it to end up with him.

If he hurt her in any way….

Her increasingly murderous thoughts were derailed by a frantic Puck.

The self-proclaimed Bad Ass sounded anything but as he hurriedly sought to reassure her.

"Whoa whoa whoa, Rachel's fine I promise."

"Why are you calling me from her phone," was Quinn's reply.

Her tone didn't ease at all.

"I," he paused for a long moment, searching for something to say, "ah fuck, I don – ow! What the hell Rach?"

Rach? Did he really just call her Rach?

A whole new, different kind of anger suffused her at the pet name. Before she could dwell on it too much she heard the diva's voice in the background. A little tinny through the fun, but full of the familiar energy and righteous indignation that she had whenever she got passionate about a subject.

"Don't swear Noah! You're far too intelligent for that. Don't give me that face! And stop stalling and say what you should have said to her right away."

The tight coil of anger that had in Quinn's gut slowly eased at the sound of the little diva's voice. It was a balm to her sharp temper and frayed nerves from her unexpected encounter with Puck.

She listened to a muted conversation on the other line, her anger slowly easing into confusion.

What was going on?

She expected the call from Rachel, maybe not quite so early, but, they'd made plans to meet up again. What she didn't understand was where Puck entered into the equation.

Finally, her irritation won out.

"Hey!" she said sharply into the phone, "I'm still here, and I'd still like to know what the fuck is going on."

The muted scuffling on the other end came to a halt at the sound of her voice.

After a long pause, Puck spoke.

"Alright, look, I'll do it. But can you leave for a second? I want to talk to her alone."

It took Quinn a second to realize that the mohawked teen was talking to Rachel and not her.

"I won't do anything bad, I promise."

Her thoughts were interrupted by Puck defending himself to something Rachel said.

"Look," he continued in response to whatever Rachel said, "I promise, and you're right. I should have done this sooner."

His voice became serious, it wasn't something that Quinn was overly familiar hearing from Puck. She listened as he spoke with Rachel, almost as if he forgot that Quinn was still on the line, hearing what he was saying.

"I promise, on my honor as a fellow Jew. I just need to be alone for this."

There was another long pause, Quinn could imagine the look Rachel was giving the larger boy perfectly.

An eyebrow raised, looking skeptically through thick lashes. Her arms crossed and full lips pursed.

Quinn shook the thoughts away before she could become distracted. Now probably wasn't the best time.

Rachel must have responded in some way because Puck spoke again.

"Thank you."

Quinn heard Rachel say something in response, but couldn't decipher it.

She was really getting sick of these long pauses though.

"Well? What's this about Puck. And why, are you with Rachel."

Her voice had lost the cold anger from earlier, but it still wasn't what anyone could call friendly. Flat, as though the conversation was an irritating chore that had to be done whether she wanted to or not.

"You know, Rachel showed up at my house at 7:30 this morning, yelling at me about the party? Shit, I wasn't even awake, I don't even know how she got in the house."

The reminder of the last time she saw Puck sent a shudder of disgust through her body.

"I really don't want to talk about this with you Puck."

"Look I know, but Rach showed up this morning, and she does that thing she does you know? When she gets all puffy and indignant and makes you feel bad and shit."

Quinn could picture it perfectly. Her, small 5'2" frame, confronting and verbally dominating a confused, half-asleep Puck. The image helped ease some of the nausea she was coming to associate with Puck. She wasn't sure how she felt about Rachel involving herself like that, but, Quinn supposed she shouldn't be surprised after yesterday. Rachel was never one to sit on the sidelines.

"Look, Quinn. I just want to say," he paused awkwardly. Puck wasn't normally one for feelings, or saying sorry, or admitting he was wrong, or a lot of things really.

"I'm sorry, okay? I could tell you were wasted at the party, and I took advantage of it."

Quinn didn't know what to say. She never expected something like that from Puck of all people. As far as she could tell, he was genuine too. He seemed extremely uncomfortable, unsure of his words. Nothing at all like the default cocky asshole he tended to be.

And yet.

"Thank you, but, I really don't want to talk about that with you right now."

Something in her strained voice must have convinced him because he didn't try to dissuade her otherwise or plead his case.

"Yea alright, I'll give the phone back to Rach, I can hear her listening in on the other side of the door."

There was a heaviness in the way he spoke. Puck wasn't someone that was used to confronting the consequences of his actions. He was more the act before thinking sort of person. It's what got him into trouble so often, and now.

She could hear Puck walking across the room, and found a reluctant smile curl on her lips at the idea of Rachel eavesdropping at the door, ready to intervene the moment Puck did anything…. Puckish.

She heard again muffled noises as the phone was handed over to its rightful owner, and muted conversation between the two.

"Hey, Quinn."

A tenseness in her shoulders that Quinn hadn't even known was there eased at the sound of Rachel's voice.

"Hey Rach," she said in reply, unconsciously copying Puck's nickname for the diva. Hers now. She may not be the person she was in McKinley. And, Rachel may not be hers in any shape or form, no matter how much she wanted it. But, she was still selfish in some ways. Puck didn't get to call her that.

"I hope you don't find it intrusive that I visited Puck on your behalf."

Quinn could perfectly see how the little brunette was reacting on the other line. Biting down on her full lip, eyes shifting in an uncharacteristic nervousness.

It was nice to know that Rachel cared about what she thought. For all her positive qualities Quinn wasn't blind to the way that Rachel rarely let what others thought affect her decisions. It would no doubt help her succeed in New York, but it also sometimes led to the girl getting caught up in whatever she was involved with and ignoring others.

Rachel must have been extremely nervous because she took Quinn's silence as condemnation and hurried to explain herself.

"I didn't mean to overstep any boundaries. I know our recent relationship is still very new. And this is a private and personal matter. I promise I didn't tell him about what resulted from that night. And I won't do it again, but it just made me so mad! What he did to you was awful, I thought Noah was better than that."

Quinn listened as the girl went on about the insensitivity of teenaged boys and how they needed to learn to treat other better, but, she wasn't hearing much of it.

All she heard was how Rachel called their new friendship a 'relationship'. The blond knew that she didn't mean it that way, but it sent a shiver down her spine nonetheless.

"It's okay Rach," Quinn spoke, interrupting the high-strung brunette. Her earlier volatile mood had settled into a warmth that the blonde was fast coming to associate with Rachel. It was hard to describe. A sense of calm, and of ease. As if no matter what was going wrong, as long as she had a few seconds to speak with Rachel, she could calm down and face it. It was a little intimidating how thoroughly and effortlessly she was affected by the smaller girl. Though, Quinn acknowledged with a rueful smile, after yesterday, this was hardly news.

"Okay," was the response from Rachel.

Her own voice easing with Quinn's acceptance of her actions.

"I appreciate it," and, Quinn found to her surprise that she kind of did. Even if the initial confrontation with Puck wasn't something she cared to repeat anytime soon, it was still nice to have someone defend her the way Rachel had.

"Are we still hanging out today?"

Quinn really didn't want to think more about Puck at the moment. She knew it was something that she would have to confront eventually. As much as she didn't like to admit, or even think about it, the thing was half his as well. But it wasn't something that she would have to deal with today. All she wanted to do today was to see Rachel.

"Of course! I'm on my way to your house now."

Quinn pushed aside the flutter in her chest at the thought of Rachel in her house.

"What did you want to do?"

"I actually had something to show you if that's okay?"

"Sure," Quinn replied easily, "when will you be here?"

The doorbell suddenly rang throughout the house.

"Right now," Rachel replied with a smile in her voice.

Quinn's eyes widened, her eyes shooting to the mirror. Her hair was mussed, she was wearing rumpled pajamas, and she hadn't brushed her teeth yet.

Shit.

"I'll be right down, give me a few seconds."

Quinn would have been mortified at how her voice cracked if she wasn't too busy throwing her phone at her bed and rushing to her dresser. She had never changed so fast in her life. She had just finished zipping up her shorts and was already running toward the bathroom, combing her hair with her fingers as she went. What followed was probably the fastest brushing of her teeth that she'd ever done in her life. Her dentist would be disappointed. Looking at the mirror one more time, mussing her hair into some semblance of order, she rushed downstairs to the front door.

Quinn threw open the door and was greeted too the sight of Rachel standing on the other side. The other girl had forgone the skirts that were a staple of her high school outfit and was wearing a pair of dark blue skinny jeans paired with a plain gray V-neck and a canvas backpack slung over one shoulder.

Quinn's mouth went dry. A girl that short had no business having legs that long.

"Hi," she greeted the diva a bit breathlessly, whether that was from her rush to get down there, or the brunette herself, Quinn couldn't be sure.

The brunette beamed a hello in response. Quinn saw the other girl then do a double take and watched in confusion as she hid a smile behind her hand.

What?

"You got a little something," the shorter girl said, gesturing vaguely towards the blondes face.

Quinn stared uncomprehendingly. Her hand raised to her own face, following the gesture automatically, and swiped. Her face flushed as she wiped toothpaste off of the corner of her mouth.

"I –"… she stalled, unable to find words, gesturing for the other girl to enter her house

Rachel, thankfully, didn't seem to mind, if the losing battle with laughter she was having was any indication.

"It's okay, it is rather early, and I am quite aware that most people do not wake up as early as I do."

Quinn had no response that wouldn't embarrass her further and so changed the subject.

"What did you want to show me?" She asked as she led the brunette to the living room and gestured toward the couch. It wasn't the smoothest of transitions, but the blonde was embarrassed enough already to not care.

The playful smirk the brunette shot at Quinn let her know that she wasn't fooled, but thankfully she let it pass without comment. The brunette reached into her backpack and pulled out a laptop. She turned it on, and as it booted up she faced the blonde.

The mood changed to something more serious as Rachel stared at Quinn, her large doe eyes conveying a measure of seriousness and sincerity.

"Quinn, you are pregnant."

Quinn's mouth went dry for a whole different reason. She said nothing. This wasn't something she wanted to think about, let alone talk about. Had it been anyone else, she would have deflected or left after that one sentence.

That wasn't an option with Rachel though, and not just because of her feelings for the singer. Quinn couldn't repay yesterday's kindness with rudeness.

Yesterday Rachel had gone way above the call of duty for her, especially considering their rocky past. So Quinn sat and said nothing, waiting for what Rachel had to say.

Rachel must have seen something of her reluctance because she reached out and placed a hand on her knee in comfort, radiating sympathy. She continued nonetheless.

"You are pregnant, and that isn't something that can be ignored. It's not fair that this happened, but it doesn't change that you are."

Here Rachel paused, looking vaguely worried, but determined.

"However, you are not alone in this. I am going to be your pregnancy partner!"

Quinn's eyes widened at that last statement. A warmth pervaded her, a heavy weight eased. It was still there, but not as unbearable as before. Quinn hadn't realized how much this had been taking a toll on her.

Trying to deal with all of it on her own, when she could barely even comprehend what it would all mean for her. It was like a sword of Damocles hanging over her by a string.

To hear that Rachel wanted to help her. She couldn't describe what she felt. Quinn wasn't sure what Rachel could do, or what would happen as the pregnancy progressed, but, she felt relief. A real reprieve from the spiral of desperation, fear, and the 'what the fuck do I do?'

However.

Quinn raised an eyebrow at the diva across from her. A teasing smile edging on her lips that wasn't quite able to hide the wetness in her eyes or the thick emotion in her voice.

"Pregnancy partner?"

It was the darker brunettes turn to flush in embarrassment.

"Yes I know, but I didn't have a lot of time to prepare. I already put finding a better name for it in my notes," she defended herself.

"Notes?" was the incredulous reply.

Laughter threatened to bubble forth from the former cheerleader.

Because notes?

That was just so Rachel.

Rachel's embarrassment faded away at the disbelief in Quinn's voice. She raised her head imperiously and sniffed.

"It is important to be thorough Quinn! I did quite a lot of research on the subject."

Quinn shook her head in disbelief, a fond smile curling her lips at the ridiculousness of the girl in front of her.

Dare she even ask?

"And the laptop?" She inquired, gesturing to the now on computer.

Rachel looked positively giddy as she logged herself in.

"I made a power point!"

Quinn lost her battle with the laughter, clutching her sides as she struggled to stay on the couch. The sheer ridiculousness of it all. Because of course Rachel made a power point presentation.

The brunette across from her huffed in mock indignation at the blonde, lecturing Quinn about the efficacy of power point as a superb way to present information.

Quinn heard none of it, too lost in her own laughter, tears at the edge of her eyes.

She didn't notice when Rachel's lecture petered off to a fond smile as the singer watched Quinn really laugh for the first time in a long while.

* * *

_Author Notes - _It lives! Well, it's been a while. A long while. Well, a staggeringly long while.

But sometimes life has a funny way of sneaking up behind you, knocking you out, and stealing your wallet. Or whatever, just being a bitch in general.

Anyways, to the story. Here we have some unexpected Puck interaction. I wasn't actually planning for him to be in the story at all, but well, Rachel just couldn't let his actions slide.

Sorry I haven't updated in a bit, I've been focused a lot on a Worm story. If you're not familiar with Worm, it's probably the most famous web serial out there, and is set in a superhero setting. Pretty far from Glee as far as settings go truthfully, but if you think you might like it, give it a shot.

Anyways, let me know what you think about this chapter. Quinn now has a partner to deal with all the trouble that comes with being a pregnant teenager. We're starting to see glimpses of what they will eventually become in New York. Fun stuff!


	5. Chapter 5

Two weeks after Puck's apology and Rachel's power point, Quinn found herself mostly satisfied with her life. Well, as much as she could be given the circumstances anyway.

Rachel had been a godsend of course. The detail orientated diva had been predictably thorough in her investigation of all the steps of pregnancies. She hadn't known that for first-time mothers the baby bump didn't typically show until at least 12 weeks into the pregnancy. The former cheerleader had been immensely relieved at the news. It gave her a larger window to try and figure out how to deal with her mother.

Unfortunately, knowing the ins and outs of pregnancy via Rachel had some downsides as well. Such as being aware of morning sickness, and when it typically occurs. This led to her being not at all surprised when she spent her second day in a row praying to her new porcelain god.

Groaning in misery, the ex-cheerio flushed the toilet and made her way to the sink to wash out her mouth.

Why the hell would people go through this willingly?

The water from the sink did little to drive away the nausea. But at least the taste was out of her mouth. Heaving a drawn out sigh, she brushed her teeth for the second time that day.

The morning sickness wasn't even the worst part. She had heard of pregnancies causing weird food cravings. But what she hadn't been aware of until Rachel's power point was that it could also food aversions.

Leaving the bathroom, she felt a familiar rising of indignation and disgust as the thought of her once favorite food drifted across her mind. The stupid parasite had caused her to hate bacon! Even the smell of it threatened to make her vomit.

She was going to fucking kill Puck.

She loved bacon. As far as Quinn was concerned, it was like 2 of the basic food groups.

The chirping of her phone interrupted the pregnant teen from her increasingly violent thoughts. Unlocking the phone, her irritation melted away into something calmer seeing it was a text from Rachel.

If there was one benefit to all of this torture, it was that she and Rachel were getting closer. They saw each other almost daily, and whenever they didn't, they still found time to talk or text each other.

If Quinn closed her eyes, she could almost pretend they were more than just friends.

The blonde felt her lips twist into a frown at the thought. Shaking it off before she could linger on how depressing that was, she opened the text.

**From: Rachel**

**To: Quinn**

**Message:** Hello Quinn, and good morning! What time did you want to go to the park today? :) :) :)

Her depressing thoughts were washed away by fondness at the sight of the message. Rachel could never bring herself to text using anything less than proper grammar and correct spelling. She remembered fondly how Rachel had tried to convince herself to text normally once. Citing its efficiency almost like a mantra to try and convince herself before she'd given up.

Really, she loved the girl, but Rachel could be hilariously high-strung sometimes.

She was about to reply when another wave of nausea rode over her. Grimacing, she did her best to ride it out. She didn't think she had anything left in her stomach to throw up. After what felt like an eternity, the feeling faded and Quinn found herself sitting down.

With a regretful sigh, Quinn replied to Rachel. She didn't think she could handle going outside today. Between the morning sickness and fatigue, the trek from her bathroom to the living room had felt like a marathon.

A pout curled her lips. She had really wanted to see Rachel today.

Groaning piteously, the pregnant girl threw herself backward haphazardly on the couch. How was it possible that she and Rachel were closer than they'd ever been before, saw each other on a near daily basis, and Quinn found herself wanting the shorter girl more than ever?

She had hoped that being friends with the diva would be enough. Even while trying to convince herself she hadn't really believed it would be. But, she had at least hoped it would get easier to deal with. Especially since they'd been spending so much time together lately. It had turned out to have the opposite effect.

The more time they spent together, the more things Quinn learned that she loved about the shorter girl. The way she bit her lip when she was nervous, the way her smile caused her entire face to light up, the way Rachel insisted on opening doors for her even though she wasn't that pregnant yet, the dork. The way the shorter girl got frustrated over the most ridiculous things, but could deal with the heaviest subjects with ease. The way she stomped her foot and crossed her arms when she was in a huff, as though she were 12 and not 18.

And her dimples.

Ugh! Groaning, Quinn flipped around on the couch and buried her face into the pillow. Those dimples should be registered weapons, they were too much. The diva just had to flash those things her way and Quinn wasn't sure she could refuse her anything.

Another chirp from her phone interrupted the blonde's continued self-torture.

**From: Rachel**

**To: Quinn**

**Message: **Hello. :)

Quinn looked over the message brow furrowing in confusion. Before she got a chance to figure out what the diva meant there was a knock at the door.

Still looking at the phone in confusion, she began to type out a reply as she went to answer the door. Still typing in the text as she opened the door she was confused to be greeted by a pair of long, toned legs.

Quinn raised her eyes from the phone and felt her mouth go immediately dry.

Oh god, this was just unfair.

Standing before her was Rachel. A Rachel who was currently in the midst of a midday run going by her attire. The blonde's eyes were wide as she took in the sight in front of her.

Rachel was wearing an expensive pair of running shoes and black running shorts that were almost criminally short. Her top half was covered by a slightly baggy athletic tank top that clearly showed the sports bra underneath it. A pair of earbud headphones hung from her neck, music blaring faintly. Quinn swallowed dryly as her eyes tracked a bead of sweat rolling down the curve of the darker girl's neck.

"It's rude to not greet your guests Quinn."

The taller girl's head jolted up to meet Rachel's amused expression.

Mortified at being caught staring, Quinn rushed to speak, "I'm sor-," and was cut off mid-sentence as her voice croaked. Red stained her cheeks as she cleared her throat and tried again.

"Hello Rachel," she said, not trusting herself to say more and wishing the ground would swallow her whole.

Rachel thankfully seemed to let her off the hook. Though the smile she wore showed her mirth.

"What are you doing here?" Quinn blurted in an effort to dispel the awkwardness only to immediately regret it.

Stupid. What if she thinks that Quinn didn't want her there?

Before she could try and fix her second blunder Rachel spoke.

"I was cooling off from my run when you texted," the diminutive brunette explained gesturing to herself in explanation. Quinn, who had by that point almost successfully ignored the other girls attire found her attention snapping appreciatively back to the point that she almost missed what Rachel said next.

"Are you alright?"

Rachel's expression had morphed from amused to concern as she gazed up at the taller girl.

"Alright?" Quinn asked distractedly, absorbed by the brunettes large doe eyes.

"You said you weren't able to go to the park today," the other girl reminded.

Quinn snapped back to the present at that.

"Oh, just morning sickness," she explained a little uncomfortably. She may have been slowly starting to accept what was growing inside of her, but she still wasn't very comfortable talking about it. Or really, thinking about it for too long.

Rachel's expression morphed into one of sympathy as she looked worriedly at the other girl.

"Oh, sorry," Quinn said, realizing that she was blocking the door and wanting to change the subject, "come in."

"So you ran here just because I wasn't feeling well?" The blonde asked doubtfully, "that's not exactly on your way."

"Of course Quinn. You are my dearest friend. I care about how you are feeling."

The brown eyed girl's voice was matter of fact, as though what she was saying was an obvious thing, and that Quinn was silly to even ask.

Quinn for her part felt a little dizzy at the sentiment. She wasn't someone used to such bold declarations. Her family was typically more reserved in showing their emotions, for someone to just boldly say what they were feeling was not something she was used too. And that Rachel considered Quinn to be her closest friend.

She couldn't quite comprehend that. She'd known they were getting closer, inevitable with the amount of time they'd been spending together lately. But a large part of her hadn't let go of the suspicion that Rachel was doing this for her, supporting her, because she was just a good person. And now she was rambling in her own head. Her thoughts were running in circles and going off on tangents.

Quinn was a jumble of confusing emotions and thoughts. All she could pin down in the moment was happiness and the faintest spark of hope.

"Thank you."

Flashing a dimpled smile at the blonde in response, Rachel tugged her into the living room.

"Since you can't go to the park," she explained, "and I do not want to go to the park without you, I figured we could have a movie day."

"I would love that," Quinn said honestly.

Spending the day with the other girl sounded almost perfect. Truthfully, the only thing that Quinn could imagine making it better would be if the brunette considered her to be more than just close friends.

Sometimes the intensity of her feelings for the diva caught her off guard. And she found herself worrying at times if it was normal for her to feel so intensely about someone as young as they both were. But then she thought about the other girl, and all that she loved about her, and the worries faded away.

"What kind of movie do you want to watch?"

"I don't really care," Quinn replied distantly, still consumed by her jumble of confusing emotions and thoughts.

"Well," Rachel replied amusedly, "maybe you can think about that while I clean myself off." She sniffed under her arm and wrinkled her nose in exaggerated disgust. "I didn't exactly think this through," she explained apologetically, "I should have showered at my place before coming over."

"It's okay, you can shower here."

"Are you sure? I don't have any clothes though."

"It's fine, you can borrow some."

"Thank you Quinn, I promise I'll be quick."

Helping the other girl to the shower and giving her clothes passed in a daze for Quinn. She couldn't quite wrap her head around the fact that the other girl was taking a shower right above her. She was caught in a war of doing her best not to think about it. It felt like a losing battle.

She was so distracted that she didn't realize 20 minutes had passed. And so she was completely unprepared for Rachel to walk down the stairs in her clothes toweling her hair dry. Once again Quinn found herself flustered by the other girl. Unprepared for the impact seeing Rachel wearing her clothes would have on her.

The clothes weren't even anything special. Just a pair of gym shorts and her old Cheerios hoodie. Just seeing Rachel in her clothes was enough thoroughly distract her.

"Thank you for letting me clean up, have you decided what we should watch?" Rachel asked as she finished with her hair.

Lost for words, Quinn just shook her head.

God, get a hold of yourself! Since the moment Rachel had shown up, she'd been a mess. In love with or not, she should be able to control herself enough to be capable of speech in the others presence.

"Oh, well, what's your favorite kind of movie?"

"Horror," Quinn answered honestly, still trying to regain some semblance of composure.

Rachel couldn't quite stop the distaste from appearing at that.

Quinn's lips quirked in amusement, "not a fan?" She teased gently.

Blushing, Rachel looked a little embarrassed.

"I don't not a huge fan of them," she deflected.

Quinn decided then and there that someday she'd have to get Rachel to see a horror movie with her. Judging by how embarrassed she looked it would probably be adorable, and hilarious.

"Well, you already know my favorite movies."

Quinn laughed at that understatement, and then laughed harder when Rachel through a pillow at her with a huff. There wasn't a single person in Lima that didn't know of Rachel's love for musicals.

"We can watch a musical," she offered.

Rachel looked at her wide-eyed.

"Are you serious?"

"Yea."

"Well I do keep some on the flash drive on my keychain," Rachel said to herself aloud.

Quinn rolled her eyes at that. Of course she did, probably on a folder next to her power points.

"Have you ever seen a musical before?" The brunette questioned doubtfully.

"No," Quinn replied truthfully. "But there's a first time for everything." And besides, if Rachel liked the things so much, she could at least give it a try. It was the very least she owed the other girl.

"You might hate it," Rachel warned.

Quinn stared at her intensely, taking in the hopeful look Rachel couldn't quite manage to hide. The way her eyes almost shined at the prospect of watching a musical. An example of her passion performed at the highest level.

"I might love it," she answered. And Quinn wasn't even sure she was still talking about movies.

The brunette flushed prettily under Quinn's stare before rushing the blonde and enveloping her in a hug.

Quinn found herself paralyzed at the scent of her shampoo in Rachel's hair. Jasmine and cyclamen invaded her senses. She closed her eyes and inhaled. She could almost forget the thing that had brought them together in this moment.

Rachel lingered in the hug for a long moment before stepping back with a smile as bright as the star she was destined to be.

"I know the perfect one!"

And that's how Quinn found herself watching her first musical. Rachel had picked out RENT as the film. She explained enthusiastically to a patient Quinn that it was one of her favorites because it was set in New York, and that she had a recording of the actual show and not the movie. Which was apparently not as good.

Quinn just nodded and went along with it while wondering why they had made a movie about a play that had already been filmed.

It wasn't that bad she supposed. Definitely not as bad as she thought it would be. Though, she thought, looking at the girl next to her who was mouthing all the words, paying rapt attention to the film. Quinn would never love musicals the way Rachel did.

She found herself understandably distracted midway through the movie when Rachel decided to lean against her shoulder on the couch they were sitting on. Quinn found that distraction multiplied infinitely when Rachel's head slid onto her lap. The diva hardly seemed to notice, absorbed as she was in the music, but Quinn couldn't say the same.

She stared at the television screen but not absorbing any of it. Slowly, hesitantly, Quinn placed a hand on the singers head and gently combed her fingers through the other girl's hair. Her breath hitched when Rachel shifted. However, before she could panic and wonder if she'd made a mistake the other girl repositioned herself on the couch and continued watching the movie.

Quinn felt oddly disconnected as time passed. From all her worries. About the pregnancy, about trying to explain to her mom, about Rachel finding out her feelings. She found herself sort of zoning out, enjoying their closeness. Having Rachel on her lap, watching a movie with her, it was implausible enough that it almost didn't feel real. Like she was viewing another life where they were together and happy.

She was so distracted, that she didn't even notice when the movie had ended. Quinn had been staring blankly at the rolling credits when she felt a poke at her side. Jolting at the sensation, she turned to find the source of the poke to be an amused Rachel Berry.

"So, what did you think?"

"It was wonderful," she replied softly.

Rachel blushed from the blonde's penetrating stare.

She had a feeling that they were talking about more than just the musical.

The sound of the front door opening interrupted them. Quinn's eyes widened in panic. What the hell was her mom doing coming home so early? After the divorce, her mother had gotten her old job back. She wasn't supposed to be home until tonight.

Worry and nervousness began to consume her. She had been purposefully avoiding her mother when Rachel was around. Not only was she keeping a huge secret from her mother, but she also didn't know what she would do if her mom reacted negatively to Rachel.

The Jewish girl was infamous in their town. Not only for her voice, but also for being the child of an interracial gay couple. Her father had more than one bad thing to say about the Berry family. Quinn felt like something in her might break irrevocably if her mother reacted badly to seeing Rachel in her home. If the progress they'd made in their relationship since the divorce turned out to be fake and her mom returned to her bottle and prejudices.

The nervousness turned to panic as the sound of heels made their way from the kitchen towards the living room. A warm hand clenched around hers and squeezed comfortingly.

"It will be alright. You're not alone."

That reminder helped to settle Quinn. That even if the worst case scenario happened and her relationship with her mother was damaged beyond repair, and she was kicked out, that she wouldn't be alone.

As much as that helped, dread still curdled in the pit of her stomach as she saw her mom walk around the corner and stop in surprise at seeing another person in her house.

"Oh, I didn't know we had guests," walking fully into the room Judy Fabray's eyes lit up in acknowledgement once she saw who it was. "I'm Quinn's mom, nice to meet you dear."

Rachel being Rachel, beamed back in response and introduced herself.

"Hello, I'm Quinn's friend Rachel Berry."

Quinn marveled at the other girl's composure and wished she could match it. Her mouth was dry and she hadn't said a word.

Not that she needed to apparently Quinn thought as she took in the surreal sight of Rachel and her mom chatting happily together. She felt like she should pinch herself to make sure this was real. The relief she felt at her mom's apparent easy acceptance of Rachel's presence was almost staggering.

Whether that acceptance would maintain if she ever found out of Quinn's true feelings for the other girl she couldn't be sure, but, even this much was more than she could have hoped for. The thought caused Quinn to feel guilty. She knew her mother was trying. She was trying hard. And if Quinn was honest with herself, she was doing a great job of it. She hadn't had a drink since the divorce, and all of her 'headache' pills had disappeared as well. She made a point to be interested in Quinn's life and plans now that high school was over, even if Quinn hadn't made it exactly easy, becoming closed off since she found out about the pregnancy.

Yet even with all of that, Quinn still struggled to fully accept her mother's drastic change. It was hard to wash away the weariness from a lifetime of experience.

"Are you sure you can't stay for dinner?"

Quinn's attention shot back to the conversation between her mom and Rachel.

Rachel looked apologetic as she replied to the older blonde, "I'm sorry, but I have previous plans with my fathers."

Quinn watched carefully for her mom's reaction. It was one thing to know who Rachel was, it was another entirely to have it stated outright.

Judy simply smiled in response. "Maybe next time then dear, I don't get to see Quinn's friends enough. And I've never met you before," she winked conspiratorially at the dusky brunette, "she must be trying to keep you to herself.

Both the teen girls blushed in response to that.

"Mom," Quinn protested in a strangled tone, finally finding her voice with that comment.

Judy merely smirked in reply, unrepentant in the face of her daughter's embarrassment.

Laughing a little with a faint blush still on her face Rachel stood up from the couch.

"I should get going, my dads are probably wondering where I am."

"Have a good day dear, it was nice meeting you," Judy spoke as she left the room to give the girls some privacy.

"Your mom was nice," Rachel said with a smile. "Nothing to be worried about," she teased gently.

"Yeah," Quinn said agreeing, still a little surprised at how well that had turned out.

"Well, I really should get going. It was nice to see you today Quinn, I'm glad you're feeling a little better."

With that, the brunette enveloped the blonde in another hug, lingering for a long moment before stepping back, and with a wave goodbye, she left.

Quinn just watched her go and wished for the millionth time she could find it in her to risk it all and let Rachel know how she felt.

"She seems like a nice girl."

Quinn jumped slightly not having heard her mom come back. Quinn just nodded, agreeing with her mom.

"Was she wearing your clothes?"

As Quinn floundered for a response for that Judy eyed her daughter speculatively.

"You know Quinnie," Judy began in a careful tone, "if you like her as much as I think you do, you're going to have to make the first move."

Quinn almost got whiplash with the speed that she snapped her head towards her mom. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"How?" She managed finally, not able to form the full question in that moment.

"Oh Quinn," Judy said with a mixture of sadness and amusement, "I'm your mother. I notice things about you."

Something bitter must have shown on her face because her mom looked sad and regretful as she moved to sit next to her daughter.

"Look," she began placing a hand on her daughter's leg, "I know I haven't been the best mother to you. And it's okay that you're worried or," she swallowed thickly and continued, "doubtful." Her voice became fierce, as she continued, "I may not have been the mother I should have been when I was still married to your father, and I'll never forgive myself for that. But, I will never make that mistake again," she spoke, a declaration threaded with pain and determination. "If that girl makes you happy, then that's all I need to know."

Judy let out a surprised breath as her daughter embraced her in a fierce hug, burying her face in her stomach.

"What if she doesn't like me back?" Her voice was muffled from the embrace and strained at the thought of rejection.

"Oh Quinn, how could she not?" Judy asked as she rubbed her daughter's back in a soothing manner.

Later, Quinn would pin this moment as the point when she fully trusted in her mother's changes. It was the moment Quinn felt strong enough to confide in her about all that she had been dealing with.

Lifting her face from her mom's stomach with wet eyes, Quinn spoke.

"Mom, I really have to tell you something."

* * *

AN: Okay another chapter. Struggled a bit to write this one out, but hopefully it doesn't read like it. If you read my other story at all you'll know I've been pretty sick for a while, which is a major factor as to why this chapter took so long. Sorry about that.

Now, what do we got here? Got some more Quinn and Rachel, a developing pregnancy (which is a subject I'm coming to learn more about than I ever cared too), and of course the infamous Judy Fabray.

Hope you guys liked it, let me know what you thought in the review section. :)


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